Enjoying Complete Recovery

When I research blog posts, I rely on the Second Edition of the Narcotics Anonymous Basic Text. The book was published by the World Service Office as an ‘official publication’ of Narcotics Anonymous in 1983. That was the same year that the First Edition was published. The Second Edition contains phrases that were removed from the First Edition. These publications resulted in a tremendous rift within the Fellowships that existed at the time. The rift has widened to a chasm today. Choosing sides has become more important to some addicts than the primary purpose. I prefer the Second Edition with the original language after studying the history. I love the language of recovery and believe in NA. One of my favorite quotes has remained constant in all versions of the Basic Text.

Yet there are others, completely abstinent, whose dishonesties and self-deceits still prevent them from enjoying complete recovery and acceptance within society.
Narcotics Anonymous Basic Text, Chapter Seven “Recovery and Relapse”, Line 6.

Complete recovery seems to involve the absence of deceit to oneself and others. When I achieve complete recovery, I will find acceptance within society. The book does reference that there is ‘no model for the recovering addict’ in Chapter eight (titled ‘We Do Recover’). What model exists for the recovered addict, I wonder?

What is Narcotics Anonymous?

One of the first publications (the Little White Book) offered this definition of Narcotics Anonymous.

N.A. is a non-profit fellowship or society of men and women for whom drugs had become a major problem. We are recovered addicts who meet regularly to help each other to stay clean.
Narcotics Anonymous, Little White Book, 1966

This definition remained place for almost twenty years during tremendous growth. Recovered addicts did meet regularly to help the still suffering addicts. The literature was changed and the 1984 Third Edition of the Basic Text revised this from ‘recovered’ to ‘recovering’. The Third Edition still included a line that classified two types of addicts.

The outer circle denotes a universal and total program that has room within for all manifestations of the recovering and wholly recovered person.
Narcotics Anonymous Basic Text, Third Edition, Published 1984, ‘Our Symbol’, pg ix.

By 1987, this changed and the Fourth Edition said ‘manifestations of the recovering person.’ References to recovered addicts were gone. The Basic Text, Chapter Eight title assured addicts that ‘they do recover’ but recovered addicts are no longer mentioned in the literature.

Why The Change?

I was told that literature was changed so that there would not be two classes of addicts; recovering and recovered. I have been told that the concept would confuse newcomers. I have never seen any evidence that, except in the addicts who proclaim their clean time loudly or boast of their accomplishments. There is a wide and blurry line between attraction and promotion within the rooms of Narcotics Anonymous. I think society gives examples we can learn from.

Marathon Runners

Two people meet at the finish line of a local marathon. One is clearly sweating, breathing heavy, and clearly recovering from the race today. The other person identifies as recovered marathoner who did not race today. The recovered marathoner has a willingness to help those who are recovering. Some may have helped during their last race. I doubt there is much discussion about who is recovering and who is recovered. One person has the capacity to help the other. It is a relationship based on love. Hopefully neither marathoner looks at the other with contempt. Both have experiences that they can share with each other.

Stigma of Being an Addict

Probably the last to be lost to freedom will be the stigma of being an addict.
Basic Text, ‘Our Symbol’, pg ix, Line 9.

Once I found acceptance in society and lost the stigma of being an addict, everything changed. My anxiety passes quickly. My defects have minimal impact on my relationships with others. I have purpose and embrace each day. I’m generally happy with life even when things do not go my way. Friendships are easier today and the challenges I face I do not need to face alone.

Service

I have found that my gratitude is best expressed as service to others. When I lose that connection to others, my gratitude quickly becomes hubris. I find myself slipping into a sense of entitlement and self-admiration. I surround myself with like-minded addicts who feel the same way that I do and lose the opportunity to spot self-deception. The recovery I fought so hard to obtain quietly slips away as I become complacent. Being part of a home group with lots of engagement and a stream of newcomers guarantees my best chances at success as a recovered addict. I feel complete today.

Addict 2.0

Addiction – History and Facts

The National Institutes of Health (NIH) which is part of the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, estimates that 10% of the population will experience drug use disorder in their lives. In Canada where I live, the number is estimated by the Canadian Government/Statistics Canada as much higher at 21.6%. Addiction is a serious condition that exists in our society today but it isn’t a new problem. A hundred years ago, most addicts primarily abused alcohol due to the wide availability and social acceptability of the substance, but many other drugs were also available. The Sears catalog offered heroin for sale during the 19^th century as an example of the ease with which you could find other drugs. Addiction, and the treatment of the disease looked very different a hundred years ago compared to today. Addiction was not seen as a disease but more as a moral failing, lack of character or weakness. Some addicts were put into institutions or jailed. The vast majority silently suffered in society until death took them. Many attempts have been made to help those who become addicted with the focus being on the worst cases. Some of the attempts have been misguided, like the development of heroin to treat morphine addiction in 1874. Today, treatment for addiction has mushroomed into a multi-billion-dollar industry. Are we further ahead or have we simply upgraded our addicts?

Alcoholics Anonymous Emerges

In the 1930’s a new movement offered real hope for those affected by alcohol addiction. Bill Wilson and Dr. Bob Smith, long time alcoholics, found sobriety. They were instrumental in starting the program known as Alcoholics Anonymous. Before Alcoholics Anonymous was an organization called the Oxford Group that laid the foundation for their recovery. Members of AA were able to repeat their success by seeking out fellow alcoholics. AA struggled tremendously as a fellowship until the twelve traditions were created which allowed individuals to work together in groups with the purpose of helping other alcoholics. For the first time a complete solution presented itself that many agreed was both effective and repeatable. Alcoholics learned spiritual principles in the twelve steps and applied those principles in the twelve traditions adopted by their groups. AA groups sprang up across the United States and to other parts of the world.

Narcotics Anonymous Finds Success

Unfortunately, AA did not offer much hope to drug addicts, but some found benefits in attending. By 1953 a second fellowship emerged that built on the success of AA by adapting the steps and traditions into what is known as Narcotics Anonymous. Both organizations have since grown tremendously, span the globe and offer separate methods of recovery based on the twelve steps and twelve traditions. While AA focuses on alcohol and continued sobriety, NA focuses on addiction and selfless service. Using substances might bring the addict to NA but ongoing recovery keeps members attending. Paramount are the efforts to help others recover and is an important part of NA. Narcotics Anonymous literature says ‘We meet regularly to help each other’ and is clearly a help others program, not a self-help program. For me, I believe that my chronic self-obsession is best treated with dedication to a greater cause.

The Minnesota Model

The unrelenting storms of change continued in other areas of the treatment industry as well. Many saw the early successes of AA and sought to incorporate the guidance of healthcare professionals. The “Minnesota Model” addiction treatment emerged in the 1950’s, where professionals would employ a group setting, aspects of the twelve steps, counselling and peer-based support. More than 80% of the treatment options available today use this model. Many treatment centres mandate attendance at twelve-step meetings.

Pharmaceuticals

Modern healthcare was transformed by the successes in the pharmaceutical industry. Penicillin and Insulin were wildly successful. Pain management drugs and treatments of many diseases were improved. The development of Disulfram (Antabuse, 1948) for alcoholism, Methadone (1964) for heroin abuse and hundreds of other drugs emerged to treat a wide range of mental health issues. Some would argue that these new classes of drugs are open to the same abuses by addicts but the benefits to others are clearly noted.

Today’s Addict

Today’s addict has a vast assortment of options available and a variety of recovery outcomes. What works and what are the potential outcomes of each person’s choices is often unclear in the early stages of recovery. Participation in twelve-step programs remains a common thread in most addicts’ journeys and those who manage the care of addicts. With so many options available, it has become impossible to determine the most successful path. Many addicts will advocate for what they believe in and doing so adds to the confusion. Recovery has evolved but so has the addict.

The Basic Text of Narcotics Anonymous

I believe that an amazing accomplishment ‘for addicts and by addicts’ is the production of the Narcotics Anonymous ‘Basic Text’ in the late 70’s and early 80’s. You can read a long version of the story behind the creation of the book at the Upper Cumberland Area of Narcotics Anonymous website. Narcotics Anonymous experienced tremendous growth during this time. The text distilled the experiences of thousands of addicts who worked on the book.

“for the first time in man’s entire history, a simple way has been proving itself in the lives of many addicts.”
Basic Text, Chapter 8, ‘We Do Recover’

Narcotics Anonymous was making an impact like nothing else before. The passage below points to the spiritual nature of the program. While some may reject the word God, often the Basic Text will use ‘Higher Power’. I believe that the word God is used to convey the idea of a greater consciousness present in our lives. Agnostics and atheists have found a place in NA. Spiritualty does not equal religion.

As we become more God-reliant and gain more self-respect, we realize that we don’t need to feel superior or inferior to anyone. Our real value is in being ourselves. Our egos, once so large and dominant, now take a back seat because we are in harmony with a loving God. We find that we lead richer, happier and much fuller lives when we lose self-will.
Basic Text, Chapter 10, ‘More Will Be Revealed’

A Warning for Addicts

The Basic Text includes a warning for members of Narcotics Anonymous.

“Some will resist. However, many will become the role models for the newcomers. The self-seekers soon find that they are on the outside, causing dissension and eventually disaster for themselves.”
Basic Text, most versions, Chapter 6, ‘Tradition 2’

And another warning.

“By the same token we have observed some members who remain abstinent for long periods of time whose dishonesty and self-deceit still prevent them from enjoying complete recovery and acceptance within society.”
Basic Text, all versions, Chapter 7, ‘Recovery and relapse’

Diversity is the strength of NA, and no one model for recovering or recovered addicts exists.

The Fellowship of Narcotics Anonymous

To maintain unity within Narcotics Anonymous it is imperative that the group remain stable, or else the entire Fellowship perishes and the individual dies.
Basic Text, Chapter 6, ‘Tradition 1’

The connection between myself and the Fellowship has been a priority in my recovery. During the best and worst moments of my recovery, I have always found time to connect with my home group. When I read literature and see the word ‘Fellowship’ I focus on my relationship with my home group. I can disagree with how a group functions, stop attending, and join a different group. No matter how much or how little a member has, what colour their skin, their religion, what their beliefs are or if they are clean, they can join any home group. The spiritual principles of being inclusive help me in all my affairs. It benefits my home group to have many different voices. I know other NA groups exist, and we are connected by our common purpose of carrying the message to the still suffering addict. This is all the Fellowship I need.

Addict 2.0

I was surprised by a letter written to the Fellowship on March 1^st, 1983 by Sally Evans, President of the Board of Trustees. The complete letter can be found here. Excerpts from the document are below.

March 1, 1983

To The Fellowship of Narcotics Anonymous

Re: Changes/Deletions/Corrections in the Basic Text of Narcotics Anonymous

In November 1982 inacuracies were noted by the World Service Office of NA, in the basic text “Narcotics Anonymous” which was then scheduled for publication. At that time a special meeting of the Chairpersons of the three Service Branches of Narcotics Anonymous, WSC, WSB, and WSO was called. At that meeting the inaccuracies in chapter 6, involving traditions four (4) and nine (9) were corrected.

[several paragraphs not included]

We believe it was not the intention of those members of the Literature Committee who selflessly devoted 100’s of hours and $1,000’s of dollars to provide the fellowship with our book, nor those members of the Board of Trustees who personally worked on and reviewed the material, nor the fellowship who approved the book, to place the Service Structure outside the Traditions or the dictates of the fellowship.

We deeply regret the oversight and the controversy that has evolved around this material. We are, however thankful that WSO discovered these inaccuracies. To the best of our knowledge no other changes/deletions/corrections were made in the book.

In Loving Service,

Board of Trustees

Sally Evans

Chairperson, WSB

Thousands of members contributed, and tens of thousands of dollars were raised by the Literature Committee. The motion to adopt and publish the Basic Text has already been approved by the World Service Conference. I did not understand how disconnected these ‘authorities on NA’ were from the Fellowship. I learned an important lesson. Narcotics Anonymous has self-seekers who are only concerned with themselves. There are also members who remain dishonest or delusional, maintaining partial recovery and acceptance in toxic cliques. By creating a new class of addicts, the service structures have separated themselves from Fellowship. The division has invited others to take sides on what is or is not Narcotics Anonymous. Unity can only truly exist at the level of home group for me today.

What I learned has helped me personally, and I maintain healthy boundaries. No matter what my contribution or involvement with any project in or out of NA, I must always remain honest, open-minded, and willing to question everything. I welcome discussion with others. Regardless of my opinions, I maintain a connection with an NA home group. The principles I practice in society are the experiences I share at meetings. I remain vigilant as the disease of addiction is progressive.

We are people in the grip of a continuing and progressive illness whose ends are always the same: jails, institutions and death.
First published in the Narcotics Anonymous Little White Book, 1966, ‘Who is an Addict?’

The Gift of Desperation

Studying Narcotics Anonymous literature is a fundamental tool for any addict seeking a solution to their disease. NA has a long history of powerful literature, written and tested by addicts. ‘Our Symbol’ is one of the most beautiful pieces of literature that I have read. First published in ‘The NA Tree’ in 1975, it was written by a founding member of Narcotics Anonymous and included in the first section of the Narcotics Anonymous Basic Text, published in 1981.

Wholly or Fully Recovered

My favorite quote from ‘Our Symbol’ is – “the outer circle denotes a universal and total program that has room within for all manifestations of the recovering and wholly recovered person”.
Narcotics Anonymous, ‘Our Symbol’, First published in the NA Tree, 1975, Line 4.

In the Basic Text is another phrase that speaks about recovery – “We can never fully recover, no matter how long we stay clean”.
Narcotics Anonymous, Basic Text, Second Edition, Chapter 7 ‘Recovery and Relapse’

I wondered at the difference between a “fully recovered addict” and a “wholly recovered addict”. Research shows that “wholly” is preferred when you want to emphasize the total and complete nature of something without reservations. “Wholly” offers a dedication to a particular idea or action more so than “fully”.

Last House on the Block

Narcotics Anonymous was the last house on the block for me. I felt uncomfortable in Alcoholics Anonymous, I could not afford treatment, and I did not see a path forward in the life that I was living. In N.A., I was willing to try anything, talk about everything and experience any feeling. I was desperate for a solution. My companions were other addicts who shared their experiences and offered their support. I believe the ‘gift of desperation’ equates to the “wholly recovered addict”. In contrast, “fully recovered” is an unreachable destination. Wholly recovered is a state of being. I was wholly committed to whatever was asked of me despite my fears.

Goodwill is best exemplified in service and proper service is “Doing the right thing for the right reason.” When this supports and motivates both the individual and the Fellowship, we are fully whole and wholly free.
‘Our Symbol’, 1975, last two lines.

Today, recovery has become a convenience store of products with a lot more choices available to suffering addicts. Narcotics Anonymous has become a commodity. I hear addicts sharing at NA meetings that they are ‘committed to trying a particular treatment center again’, ‘working the steps in therapy this time’, and ‘making sure they get to that wonderful AA meeting on Tuesday nights’. I am confused by experiences of others today. Parking lot discussions seem to be about distractions from life on life’s terms. There used to be discussions focused on NA, on our primary purpose. I want to talk about our primary purpose and the application of spiritual principles daily in all my affairs.

On the bright side, today many N.A. members have long terms of complete abstinence and are better able to help the newcomer. Their attitude, based in the spiritual values of our Steps and Traditions, is the dynamic force bringing increase and unity to our program. Now we know that the time has come when that tired old lie, “Once an addict always an addict,” will no longer be tolerated by either society or the addict himself. We do recover.
Narcotics Anonymous Little White Book, published in 1966

Desperation

The idea of “‘wholly recovered” was removed from our literature by the publishers. I no longer feel as welcome as I used to be. The desperation is gone, and I find myself attracted to the complacency of many addicts. Maybe I should relax and have fun, but instead I feel a sense of sadness. The last house on the block is torn down, replaced with a convenience store that has me thinking about living off-grid again. Therein lies the problem.

A desperate addict will do anything for Narcotics Anonymous because they are out of options. Therein lies the solution.

Did you exchange a walk-on part in the war for a lead role in a cage?

Pink Floyd, ‘Wish You Were Here’ song

Narcotics Anonymous and the Cults

Early Recovery

Early recovery in Narcotics Anonymous was incredibly easy and difficult at the same time. The unconditional love of the Fellowship gave me a place to heal. I’ve never lost that feeling and even today I find great comfort attending meetings regularly. The best part of Narcotics Anonymous is simply participating in the healing of others. I know of no greater source of joy. What was difficult was taking my entire life and dumping it out on the floor to examine like a kitchen junk drawer. My relationships and my behaviors needed to be examined. My emotions were suppressed by the drugs I used. The dishonesty that came so easily no longer felt as comfortable.

Fellowship was easy early on because I surrounded myself with addicts in the same situations. We were all in a life raft, clinging together and hoping we survived. The constant losses of members who left to return to the depths of despair made the life raft even more valuable. Healing is a slow process and during that time I had the opportunity to talk to members about common experiences that we all shared. I found strength because of the Fellowship. I found hope in this new way of living in my own life and seeing the changes in others. Freedom and gratitude became reality. I learned that freedom comes with a cost and gratitude requires effort. When I reject one or the other complacency follows.

Navigating these new freedoms and expressing gratitude in Narcotics Anonymous is a source of conflict that grows more difficult with each passing day. There is a great parody that the lives we lived in the beginning created unity and the lives we live in later recovery create differences. We each have our own ideas of freedom and gratitude. Those differences can become divisions. I believe that it is the divisions that weaken our ties. I start to formulate opinions about what works and what healthy recovery looks like. Opinions take on a life and soon my recovery becomes ridged. I create rules that start to sound like a sermon when I share. I find like-minded addicts who support my opinions. Unity becomes fragmented with divisions of addicts snarling like dogs over a scrap of food. One definition of cults is a group of individuals whose beliefs and practices seem strange or even sinister to others.

“A cult is an authoritarian organization centred around a belief, that has rules and dogma and encourages its members to isolate themselves from those who would test their faith.”

I recently found this quote in an article called ‘Cult Thinking and How To Avoid It’ by Alex Marwood. She listed eight behaviors of cults and I found all of it is relevant to my ongoing recovery.

Othering or Manicheanism

Cults tend to isolate members from those who question their shared beliefs. There is a wonderful feeling of being included in the exclusive cult of like-minded members. I sought membership in Fellowship cults for more than a decade. The extreme end of the cult-like behavior is believing you are in a battle between good and evil. Cult members gather, socialize together and hold events. Sometimes they borrow the NA name for these exclusive gatherings. The recent World Convention of NA in Washington DC in 2024 was an example of such a cult gathering. Less than twenty thousand gathered, most of whom are fervent supporters of the Narcotics Anonymous World Service Corporation(NAWS). Opposing or voicing opinions that conflict with strong held beliefs can be dangerous because you will find yourself isolated from the support needed to overcome addiction. I was fortunate to attend and participate but I sought out members who think independently of the Cult of NAWS.

I have found that supporting a Home Group is the healthiest way of remaining in NA. A healthy home group can include members who have little or nothing in common with each other. I invite discussion and welcome conflict. Newcomers attending my home group regularly help keep my recovery vibrant and alive. I might disagree with every point someone makes but the fact that they are equally passionate about their beliefs keeps my recovery strong and benefits my Home Group. When members disagree and the Home Group arrives at solutions, newcomers get to see a Higher Power at work.

Evasiveness

Core beliefs of cult members can conflict with reality but are required to maintain status within the cult. Explanations about Narcotics Anonymous are shaped to maintain the core beliefs. Some core beliefs are lies propagated by the cult. For example, the phrase ‘global group conscience’ is a fictitious concept. This behavior is particularly evident in many of the service structures surrounding Narcotics Anonymous. Service bodies are rarely supported by Home Group conscience anymore. Less than fifteen percent of World Service Conference motions are voted on by Home Groups. Some members’ behaviors would never be acceptable anywhere except in these service structures. Lying and presenting false evidence is common. The perception of power by aligning service structures to Narcotics Anonymous creates unhealthy relationships that are open to abuse. The original Basic Text approved by Home Groups included language that helped prevent this evasiveness and is growing in popularity. The approved Tradition Four specified that Narcotics Anonymous service structures were not part of the NA Fellowship. I am careful today to include volunteer work and relationships outside of NA in my recovery. This helps me to stay connected to reality.

Marching, Chanting, Singing, Dancing

Clean Time countdowns highlight the importance of some members. This helps create power structures within the Fellowship that promote abuse. Clean time has little bearing in Narcotics Anonymous, but cult members overvalue the importance of years clean and past service commitments in assigning responsibilities.

Announcing upcoming recovery birthdays allows cult members to applaud loudly the upcoming event of another cult member. Big celebrations make rising stars in the cult feel important. Some members clap and chant NA slogans at recovery events. Hypnotists refer to these behaviors as Hypoxia. The behavior creates feelings of love and joy that renders the addict open to suggestion. Eventually your brain is programmed to reject reality and accept cult ideas as true. I do not participate in many events, and I remain silent until all the birthdays’ celebrations are read. I would not want anyone to feel less than. I try to avoid discussing my clean time, particularly when I share. I find that newcomers have a better connection when my sharing is current and relevant to my ongoing recovery.

Binary Thinking

Binary thinking is the illusion that there are two sides and you have to pick one. Cults reject individual thinking and tend towards group thinking. One example is Consensus Based Decision Making that has become increasingly popular in service structures by cult members. Intellectual papers on CBDM point out that group thinking is one of the flaws of CBDM because the solutions do not reflect the will of the individuals involved. It is not a surprise that cult members embrace it. Service Structures are growing increasingly independent from the Group Conscience of NA Groups by employing CBDM. Narcotics Anonymous has an entire Tradition devoted to the importance of Group Conscience that is often ignored. Each individual member shares equal responsibility in NA and I find that is best expressed at a Home Group.

“It’s Quite Simple”

Life is not simple. Simple solutions often involve long discussions and compromise. Individual groups and members can differ in opinions and ideas. Cult members hold on to cult ideas and rely on dogma. Cult members like to say ‘it’s quite simple’ when, in fact, it is not. Discussions about historical literature, DRT/MAT, verification papers, fund flow and Public Relations have all been discussed and decided by cult members. Cults already have the answers. Life is simple when I abdicate my responsibilities to the cult of popular opinion. I try and maintain separation from members who believe they have all the answers. I embrace honesty, open-mindedness and willingness in myself and others. Healthy discussions within a home group promote unity and create an atmosphere of love.

Projection

Projection is when I see my negative characteristics in others. These projections say more about me than others. Cults do not want individuals to seek answers within themselves, because those beliefs might conflict with core beliefs of cult members. When I understand my beliefs then I can discuss our differences. Learning to compromise or allowing others to learn their own lessons by making mistakes is valuable. When I understand my own beliefs and allow others to have their beliefs then we can find compromise. This practice is a valuable part of being in a Home Group. The tools learned are valuable to me and help me survive outside of my Home Group.

Firing Your Friends

Firing friends who go against the cult is important if you want status within the cult. It is uncomfortable to have relationships with friends who do not support the cult. Learning to experience uncomfortable feelings is an important part of recovery. I have a lot of friends today. I have never been so supported and loved. Anyone I encounter is going to behave or believe in something that can make me feel uncomfortable. How I resolve those feelings is important if I am;

‘enjoying complete recovery and acceptance within society’
Basic Text, Second Edition, Chapter 7, ‘Recovery and Relapse’, preamble.

Cognitive Dissonance

Cognitive dissonance is a feeling that jolts me when evidence does not support something I believe to be true. Critical examination of the facts is not easy, and I try repeatedly to return to complacency; a smug satisfaction with my life and my beliefs. Cult members take this to the extreme by only interacting with other cult members and this allows them to avoid cognitive dissonance. Cognitive dissonance occurs often in healthy people. I believe that the ability to question your beliefs is healthy. I find that cognitive dissonance jolts me into being open-minded and I try to follow that up with a willingness to explore new ideas. A great source of strength is newcomers who challenge my long-held beliefs. Step Ten encourages me to inventory myself with the help of others.

Finally…

I find the best place to share about my ongoing practice of spiritual principles is my Home Group, and the opportunity to connect with someone new is the greatest joy I know. A newcomer to my Home Group presents an opportunity to grow spiritually. I try to share my experiences and not my gratitude. Gratitude is best expressed in my actions. I love Narcotics Anonymous, and I love my recovery today. I don’t talk about gratitude, I show it daily by working on a program of recovery, the NA way. I have a Home Group and a sponsor. I attend meetings regularly and I actively participate in giving back what was freely given to me.

Money, Property and Prestige?

I have recently experienced a couple situations that got me thinking about Narcotics Anonymous and money. I should change the word thinking to pondering. I was taught not to overthink things and keep it simple. I guess that is my reason to ponder more because I am seeing things done in Narcotics Anonymous that are different than what I was taught. Change happens but some of these changes feel wrong.

A Change In The Way Recovery Is Administered

I was always taught by my predecessors that we should not collect more money than we need. And that money we do collect needs to be used responsibly. Early on in my recovery I found this to be simple. I was taught to put my 7th Tradition contribution in the basket and participate in my homegroup to discuss and determine how those funds are used. What is sent to the area for services like H&I, Public Information and most importantly how the area serves the groups. Then funds can be sent to the region to help support the areas. Sounds easy enough right? Not so much anymore. Over the past few years, I have seen a change in the way recovery is administered to people coming in the doors. I see changes in group spending. I see changes in area funds and how they are collected. I see and hear folks talk about and doing fundraising for everything.

Groups

So, let’s start with groups. I understand that groups are autonomous to make their own decisions. I just get uncomfortable when I see groups throw big BBQs and food parties at the group level using funds from the 7th Tradition basket. I even saw a group take the 7th Tradition funds and separate it into two pots of money. One pot was used for what I was taught we use 7th Tradition funds for. Things like rent, coffee, literature. The other pot was used for special activities like BBQs. The food and venue would be paid for using 7th Tradition funds. Then the two pots of money would be shifted back and forth depending on what event was happening and how much money was needed to throw a free party. Holding a speaker meeting at the party was claimed to be “carrying the message.” My teaching was meetings are where the recovery begins and is learned. If I attend a group activity, I pay my own way by buying a ticket and help with the event. Sure, parties are fun, but I would prefer to supply every person with literature instead of charging for the books. (When I came in, I was so sick I did not understand why I needed literature, but I saw that everyone had it, so I stole my first book.) Today I understand the lifesaving nature of literature and the need to read and study it. (And I clearly do not understand why a homegroups needs their own t-shirts. But that may be a story for another day.) We do not need parties to stay clean. We need to be taught about recovery and as you progress and stay clean the parties and conventions will come.

Conventions

I am an experienced person in many levels and types of service. I am grateful that I was taught service very early on and it is a powerful tool to stay clean. I have always been good with convention committees. I enjoy seeing people learn to have fun and stay clean. (I connected getting loaded to having fun. Didn’t think it was possible clean) Lately I feel myself getting a bad taste for conventions. I recently served on a convention committee that had $75,000 left after all the bills had been paid. (This convention makes that same excess every year.) As I watched the money coming in my stomach rumbled. My gut was reacting to charging money for a ticket for every single activity that was held at the convention. (registration, merchandise, dinner, breakfast, dances, comedians, raffles, etc.) When I suggested doing the dance and comedians at no cost the committee looked at me like I had horns. How could I suggest such a horrible thing? (A donation fund for newcomers is always set up at this convention and those newcomer funds are never fully spent.) What is wrong with doing events at no cost when the convention is left with so much overage in funds? Instead, at the end of the convention we are arguing over what to do with the excess money. I see money from conventions, retreats, campouts, etc. being given to other areas and events instead of reducing things like registration fees. To me conventions and activities are special events we do but we are still responsible to be self-supporting. These events are done in the name of Narcotics Anonymous but are not Narcotics Anonymous. Many people disagree with me on that point. For me it comes down to staying clean. If I never attend another special event or convention, I will stay clean by using the tools. My recovery is not based on my attendance at conventions.

Grandiosity

I guess I see more grandiosity than I feel is needed. Let’s get back to keeping it simple. I am still an avid attendee at meetings and prefer literature studies. I still participate in service in many ways. Service has saved me more than once. I will continue to serve and discuss issues that do not sit well with my sponsor. I will try to be part of the solution. I can disagree but will not participate where I feel conflict with group or committee practices. I will pick more closely what I feel is the best option for the most.

The Promulgator of Narcotics Anonymous

My wife and I discussed cults when I first started attending Narcotics Anonymous meetings. One of her coworkers had attended the NA Fellowship and assured my wife that NA was not a cult and the people I was connecting with were good people. I used to live with a lot of social anxiety and fear dominated my world. I tentatively started to explore Narcotics Anonymous and all that was available. I noticed that suggestions seemed to be presented as facts. ‘Do the Steps or Die!!’ sounded like a rule when I was new. I have found that expressing opinions has become a natural progression of both the disease and my recovery. Sometimes I share ideas about ‘how things are done’, and sometimes I simply like the sound of my own voice. A promulgator is someone who announces a code of law. It gets easier as the years go by to have opinions and express them. I no longer find it helpful. One of my favorite definitions of a cult and source of the word promulgator;

‘Cult – a system for the cure of disease based on dogma set forth by its promulgator’
Merriam-Webster.com Dictionary

Experienced Members

I have ideas about what works and what does not. Sometimes my ideas are helpful and accurate, but I have learned that I cannot deny other people the same lessons I learned. Doing the wrong thing for the wrong reasons has opened my eyes to new solutions and a better understanding of honesty, open mindedness, and willingness. Our literature talks about this subject.

Sharing with fellow addicts is a basic tool in our Program. This help can only come from another addict. It is help that says, “I have had something like that happen to me, and I did this….” For anyone who wants our way of life, we share experience, strength and hope instead of preaching and judging. If sharing the experience of our pain helps just one person, it will have been worth the suffering. We strengthen our own recovery when we share it with others who ask for help. If we keep what we have to share, we lose it. Words mean nothing until we put them into action.
Narcotics Anonymous Basic Text, Chapter Five, ‘What Can I Do’

The critical ideas that I take from this paragraph are that we avoid ‘preaching and judging’. I also need to understand when someone is asking for help. The most important part of recovery for me today is humility and that requires that I share experiences rather than opinions. My opinions are based on complacency, the enemy of members with clean time. My actions are critical to my success.

Narcotics Anonymous is a spiritual, not religious program. Any clean addict is a miracle, and keeping the miracle alive is an ongoing process of awareness, surrender and growth. For an addict, not using is an abnormal state. We learn to live clean. We learn to be honest with ourselves and think of both sides of things. Decision-making is rough at first. Before we got clean, most of our actions were guided by impulse. Today, we are not locked into this type of thinking. We are free.
Narcotics Anonymous Basic Text, Chapter Eight, ‘We Do Recover’

Living in an Abnormal State

It is uncomfortable being in an abnormal state of not using but today I have adjusted. I am approaching twenty-two years in the program. I do have experiences to share but I also have a lot of unnecessary dogma. Separating the two is challenging. I ‘use’ my clean time to try to enforce rules rather than explaining the experiences that brought me to my understanding. Listening to both sides of the same argument over and over can be boring and frustrating. I cannot be the whole program to any individual. Doing the work means I participate in service and talk with members. I cannot take responsibility for your recovery. The things that I find attractive about recovery you might find repulsive. I find recovery is about helping others but for some, it is simply helping themselves.

I am free today and I want you to be free as well. Narcotics Anonymous is a spiritual program. Sometimes I behave like NA is a religion or a cult. I believe in the dogma and surround myself with like-minded members. Little cliques of experienced members were scary in the beginning but now I understand that many are self-seekers with little concern for others. Some days I pretend I am in recovery and create my own little cliques to protect myself from reality. I feel safe when I am a part of even if it’s for the wrong reasons. I am always seeking a balance between taking responsibility and participating for my recovery.

Events and Conventions

I feel the urge to go to events and conventions and pretend I am carrying the message rather than participate in carrying the message. The reality is that the world is full of people I neither like nor agree with. The best place for me to find recovery is in the diversity of my Home Group. I have friends and enemies in a healthy home group. This is the best representation of Fellowship that I can experience and a source of strength. The strength of those relationships is what I take into the world that exists outside of NA. I learn to take responsibility for my actions. I also participate in group consciousness at every business meeting for my home group. I participate in the atmosphere of recovery when I attend meetings regularly at my home group. What I learn I can carry to other groups I attend and in all my relationships.

Home Group

I will make sure that my Home Group is available to any addict seeking recovery. I distribute meeting lists and monitor how many newcomers attend each meeting. A count of the number of newcomers and people coming back are the only attendance records my group keeps. Actions form the basis of my recovery and are the actions I take with me in my relationships outside of NA. Today, I enjoy complete recovery and acceptance in society, exactly as our literature promises.

A Divided Fellowship Emerges

My Writing

My writing sometimes reflected the confusion I felt. At the time, I was not really clear in my mind about the truths and I was still in the grip of the Cult of NAWS. I attracted new contacts and found support to continue writing with each article. Each conversation, and each person who took time to help me became a cherished member of my support group. I was fortunate to develop a new support group of compassionate, generous, and loving individuals. I have found it difficult to separate myself from my resentments sometimes. I tried communicating my viewpoints in articles without making them come across like I was the voice of Narcotics Anonymous. I was not always pleased with the results of my writing. Effective communications skills have been one of the benefits of this writing experience these last few years and my personal recovery has benefited from being connected to a global Fellowship. I have found it so odd to be denied the opportunity to distribute meeting lists and worse, criticized for printing them at my own cost. Now I see the cult mentality of some members. The transition from a cult mentality to a Fellowship mentality was difficult for me but I persisted in attending meetings regularly. I feel very grateful to have experienced the cult mentality of some members. The Merriam/Webster Dictionary online offers one definition of cult.

“a system for the cure of disease based on dogma set forth by its promulgator”
[https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/cult]

I had to look up promulgator as well.

“(law) one who promulgates laws (announces a law as a way of putting it into execution)”

“law, jurisprudence – the collection of rules imposed by authority; ‘civilization presupposes respect for the law’; ‘the great problem for jurisprudence to allow freedom while enforcing order’”

“lawgiver, lawmaker – a maker of laws; someone who gives a code of laws”
[https://www.thefreedictionary.com/promulgator]

I cringed when I read this because of my own behaviors. Some days I feel terrible about myself because I was caught up in ego and no longer sharing my experience, strength, and hope. I often become a promulgator. My humility opened the door to empathy to others who suffered in a similar way.

Having an opinion is different than sharing your experience. I can try to communicate ‘my experience is that attending Narcotics Anonymous meetings regularly has helped me a great deal’. Unfortunately, my experiences often come out as opinions. I still say that you should attend ninety meetings in ninety days before you have an idea of what NA is about. That’s an opinion and other members might share that same opinion. We start to chant this dogma as if it is a law. Narcotics Anonymous literature suggests we attend a meeting daily for ninety days. Anyone who shares different ideas about this or tries different ways than this can become open to criticism, contempt, and exclusion from the cult.

I immersed myself in Narcotics Anonymous for more than a decade in the beginning. I was fully engulfed in the cult of NAWS. Many cult members are promulgators. I attended a lot of meetings both online and in person the first year. Online or virtual meetings existed early on but have never been recognized by the NAWS corporation. This added to my confusion about what is and is not Narcotics Anonymous. A virtual group has never been able to register and be recognized by the NAWS corporation. I did become involved in service, attended events, and looked to the Fellowship for friendships and support with mixed results in my first decade.

Facts and Opinions

Separation of opinions, facts and experiences is very difficult when anyone is communicating. I can see early in the development of the service structures how members would weave their ideas using all three of these mechanisms for communication. In the 1980 World Service Conference minutes, Jimmy Kinnon, a respected member of NA and one of the founders from that first meeting in 1953, was responding to a question from those in attendance by stating that;

“page 22 of the Service Manual states what WSO is – a non-profit corporation. Most questions are answered in this section of Service Manual. Stated that WSO is more of a business than it is part of the Fellowship. WSO is separate from N.A. but works with N.A. WSO, Inc. functions as a non-profit corporation with Managers, administrators, Departments, paid employees (not at present but hopefully in the future), subsidiaries ·and the like.”
[NA History Tree website, World Service Conference Minutes, 1980, page 11] [https://nahistorytree.com/wp-content/uploads/2022/07/1980-wsc-minutes.pdf]

He was expressing facts and opinions. He quoted guidelines from the current service manual. Likely he was referencing the 1979 3^rdEdition of the Service Manual. See – [http://www.nauca.us/wp-content/uploads/2015/05/1979-3rd-Edition-Service-Manual.pdf]

In the same minutes, Chuck Skinner, Chairman of the Board of Trustees was asked a question.

“what course of action on groups not following suggested 12 Step of N A. and more importantly, the 12 Traditions of N.A. ( ie . ,dissention ,non-participation at Area Service, inter-relations with outside interest groups ). “

Chuck stated that.

“any area where there is a violation of the Traditions, the 1st step would be for the Region that is dealing with that organization that is violating the Traditions be informed that they are to cease and desist. If they refuse, notify WSO who will in turn send the cease and desist information. If that fails, notification to the Board of Trustees who, with the WSO , will take any necessary legal action. Question from the floor re : this issue in which an issue such as this was brought to a Region’s attention and that things would be left as is until the Conference . Chuck stated that if a Tradition is being violated, it should be taken care of immediately . Question was what does the Region do in terms of meeting directories. Chuck stated that no assistance should be offered to any breakings of the Traditions. Remove these meetings from the directories forthwith. That would be the first action. Notifying the people as such in front. “
[WSC Minutes, 1980, page 15]

[WSC Minutes, 1980, page 15]

Leadership is highly valued but often abused

Chuck’s comments are purely opinion and had no basis in fact. None of his recommendations were backed by any policies or procedures. His opinions had some weight given his position and time in Narcotics Anonymous. As a ‘trusted servant’ his duty is to serve the groups and not his own personal agenda or falsely represent ideas as fact. Unfortunately, it is a common problem and one I experience daily in attending meetings. The ability to include or exclude any Group simply did not exist and has never existed. This idea of exclusion has become a strong dividing point in the development of the cult of NAWS service structures. Shunning and excluding is normal practice within the cult of NAWS Inc. It is of little surprise how few groups now support area, region and world services when this is put into practice.

The internal problems with defining service structures got worse over the next ten years. By 1990, the Fifth edition of the Basic Text was in print and had been altered by the WSO and the Board of Trustees to reflect the opinions of a select few rather than the original Basic Text that was approved by groups in 1981. Many early supporters of the WSC had fled in disgust. What was left was a minority who embraced this imposing service structure and sought to increase the power and control of this fledgling cult. This article highlighted my early ideas about the Cult of NAWS.

All Else is not NA

The Narcotics Anonymous known globally was started in 1953. In 1972 the World Service Office was formed and a 1976 World Service Conference was organized. The World Service Office was started to distribute literature. The World Service Conferences were organized to try and provide some structure to the growing Fellowships scattered around the United State, Canada and abroad. The World Service Office would eventually become Narcotics Anonymous World Services Inc. (NAWS Inc. for short) that took control of literature production and rights in the 1990’s.

By the early 1980’s, Narcotics Anonymous was starting to become a recognized solution for people who suffered from the disease of addiction. There were over one thousand Home Groups worldwide predominately in the United States but spreading to other parts of the world. A man known to many as ‘Bo S.’ rose to prominence within the Fellowship and with the support of the World Service Conference, became the World Literature Chair. Bo worked tirelessly and with great personal sacrifice to help the Fellowship of Narcotics Anonymous distill the combined knowledge of the time into what is known as the “Narcotics Anonymous Basic Text”. The effect was dramatic; nothing would ever be the same again in Narcotics Anonymous. By the end of the 1980’s Narcotics Anonymous had grown to over ten thousand Home Groups, and there were many different versions of the Basic Text in circulation. Several of the original paragraphs that were reviewed and approved by the groups for printing became contentious with some of the founding members.

One might ask: Is this really true, are we truly autonomous, what about our service committees, our offices, our activities, our hotlines, and all the other things that go on in N.A.? The answer, of course, is that these things are not N.A. They are services that we can utilize to help us in our recovery and to further the primary purpose of our groups. Narcotics Anonymous is a Fellowship of men and women, addicts, meeting together in groups, and using a given set of spiritual principles to find freedom from addiction and a new way .to live. All else is not N.A. Those other things we mentioned are the result of members caring enough to reach out and offer their help and experience so that our road may be easier. Whether or not we choose to utilize these services for the benefit of a group is up to us, they are not thrust down our throats.
Basic Text, Tradition Four – Approval Draft, distributed 1981

A Rift forms and Members are Forced to Choose Sides.

This caused bitter infighting. Members were pitted against other members. In March of 1983, the chair of the World Service Board issued a response.

…fact that the book as approved by the 1982 World Service Conference contain the following inaccuracies: In tradition four the book states that SERVICE COMMITTEES ARE NOT NA and later in the same paragraph states “All ELSE IS NOT NA” clearly indicating that they are not a part of Narcotics Anonymous. The book further states “whether to utilize these services is up to the group”. This would allow any group to do whatever the group chose to do and continue to call themselves an NA Group, leaving the fellowship no recourse but to allow them to do so. Any group could use any literature they choose to use in meetings. The use of literature other than NA literature in meetings has been a problem in the past. This is but one of many problems that could surface in the future should the book be printed as approved.
Sally Evans, chair of the World Service Board – Link to the entire letter

World Literature Committee revoked publishing rights.

The World literature Committee were shocked at the unauthorized changes and revoked the rights of the World Service Office to print the Basic Text. What happened after is open to speculation and conjecture. There are a lot of opinions on what transpired over the next several years. Many experienced members simply walked away and returned to the roots of their recovery by supporting groups and local service efforts. Manipulation and control seem to always defeat kindness and generosity. This is evident in the fact that under NAWS Inc, The North American Groups have seen zero growth in over 30 years beyond the ever-increasing price of the literature. Members today are confused by the trusted servants who manipulate the truth and exert control. The significant international growth of the fellowship has come about because of the kindness and generosity of thousands of members like Bo S and not a result of service committees.

Collective will of the many and the few

The question that never seems to get asked is why the groups approved the literature with the phrase “all else is not N.A.” This was no random mistake or inaccuracies in transcription. Thousands of addicts wrote, reviewed and approved the original literature. A small group of individuals modified the literature. Perhaps one answer is to go back further to the Little White Book.

“This is a simple spiritual -not religious-program, known as Narcotics Anonymous.”
Narcotics Anonymous, Little White Book, “We Do Recover”, originally published 1966. See here on The Narcotics Anonymous Upper Cumberland Area website, History section.

a Google search offered this interesting explanation of religion.

“Religion is a set of texts, practices and beliefs about the transcendent shared by a community and involves a relationship with God. Spirituality on the other hand is about a person’s relationship with the transcendent questions that confront one as a human being. This may or may not involve relationships with God.” [Transcendent – beyond or above the range of normal or merely physical human experience.]

Tradition One

Tradition One tells us that “Our common welfare should come first; personal recovery depends on N.A. unity.” I have always believed the Fellowship’s welfare is ahead of my personal welfare; personal recovery involves sacrifices. Those sacrifices I make are not about loss or suffering but about generosity and kindness. These are some of the spiritual principles I practice in all my affairs. If self-obsession is the core of the disease of addiction, then it would make sense that I adopt spiritual principles that oppose that behavior. My desire is to stop using not just drugs but anything that can be addictive including money, manipulation and control. The relationship I maintain with a power greater than myself is my source of strength. No service body can define what sacrifices I choose to make at any moment. The responsibility for my recovery lies within myself. The choices I make do not exclude me from membership. The sacrifices I make can become the help I offer. “We meet regularly to help each other stay clean”. NA is not a self-help program but a help others program. Narcotics Anonymous is a Fellowship and not a religion. I would say that my Fellowship is my Home Group and beyond that are other groups who may or may not choose to work in unity, but our common goal is to support members and attract newcomers and all else is not NA.

The Recovery Process

The early years of Narcotics Anonymous were full of efforts to document what worked. Those involved believed literature was important and could ease the journey of those who still suffered. Addicts who had experienced recovery found a sense of responsibility in carrying the message to the still suffering addicts. Tremendous efforts went into writing the Narcotics Anonymous Basic Text. There is an interesting sentence in the Basic Text originally published in 1981.

Yet there are others, completely abstinent, whose dishonesties and self-deceits still prevent them from enjoying complete recovery and acceptance within society.
Narcotics Anonymous, Basic Text, Second Edition, Chapter Seven, ‘Recovery and Relapse’, preamble, First paragraph.

Complete Recovery

Complete recovery is magical. When I can add to that ‘acceptance within society’ I feel what can only be described as an amazing state of grace. The only obstacles I have found to this grace are my dishonesty and self-deception. Clean time is not a factor as I talk to other members and visit various groups. It feels good to just accept the best from each day. My character defects do not affect my ability to enjoy complete recovery. My history no longer weighs me down. The future holds no surprises I need to fear. I am free to be the person worthy of unconditional love that I experienced at those first Narcotics Anonymous meetings I attended. Critical to my complete recovery is the idea that I am a sick person. Surrender and acceptance of the disease is my most important goal each day. I need to be mindful of the disease that surrounds me in Narcotics Anonymous. I was confused for a long time about how sick people can help me. I was confused about how the sickness affected me. I have come to an understanding of the process of recovery that works for me today.

After coming to N.A. we realized we were sick people…who suffered from a disease like Alcoholism, Diabetes or Tuberculosis. There is no known “cure” for these—all, however, can be arrested at some point and “recovery” is then possible.
Chapter Three, ‘Why are we here’, preamble, Third paragraph.

The Twelve Steps

I was taught that the disease can be arrested at some point and only then is recovery possible. Understanding how the disease affected me was a process I learned in the Twelve Steps. I learned about my assets and defects. I made peace with the past in my amends. The most important discovery was the concept of a higher Power. The spiritual nature of the program of Narcotics Anonymous gave me purpose. Purpose directs my efforts today. If self-obsession is the core of the disease, then meeting regularly to help each other seems like a logical solution. My efforts to be of service help to arrest the disease. I found that attending a meeting clean was the only service had to offer some days.

The progression of recovery is a continuous uphill journey. Without effort we start the downhill run again. The progression of the disease is an ongoing process, even during abstinence.
Narcotics Anonymous, Basic Text, Second Edition, Chapter Seven, ‘Recovery and Relapse’, preamble, Fourteenth paragraph.

Effort

The literature says that effort is required for recovery to become possible. I also learned that the disease progresses regardless of my efforts to recover. Narcotics Anonymous gave me the love I needed to overcome defects. My disease often manifests in my defects. I learned how to become entirely ready to have God remove the defects as obstacles to my efforts. The disease of addiction is insidious and some days I am reluctant to make any effort. Some days are better but I risk becoming complacent. Complacency is not laziness but a smug sense of satisfaction that I accomplished enough. Either way it is easy to return to using. The opportunity to use is on both sides of the pendulum of highs and lows.

The longer I am clean, the stronger my urge to use. I have experienced the progression of the disease despite remaining clean. I often find myself returning to using when acting on my defects. Using tells me things that I want to hear. I sometimes find it difficult to silence the addict in my head.

The quality of my life has improved in recovery. My addiction tells me to see that as an accomplishment. That proves to me that I am doing the right things or that I know something. I stop seeing recovery as a blessing or gift that should be shared. My good fortune gives me the idea I can use successfully. My sense of entitlement grows. I need to remind myself that the longer I am here, the less I know. I have been here long enough to experience difficulties as well. The highs and lows are not evidence of anything other than life unfolding on life’s terms. I am powerless over each moment. Each passing moment writes the future as past.

I learned that my reluctance to apply effort to all areas of my life affects all aspects of my life. The greatest teacher I have found is participation in a home group and the application of the Twelve Traditions.

The Twelve Traditions

My addict is using when he tells me things I want to hear.

I do not need to attend my home group business meetings.
What I have to say is not important.
I simply do not care about my home group enough to attend.
I just want to avoid the struggles of working with other addicts.
I find am too busy to participate in service with others.

The only alternative is to stop using and start learning how to live. When we are willing to follow this course and take advantage of the help available to us, a whole new life opens up. In this way, we do recover.

Today, secure in the love of the Fellowship, we can finally look another human being in the eye and be grateful for who we are.
Chapter Eight, ‘We Do Recover’, last two paragraphs.

I learned that we meet regularly to help each other. Narcotics Anonymous is not a self-help program. Fellowship is the members of my Home Group.

The Twelve Steps taught me about effort but the Twelve Traditions taught me about recovery. Today my efforts have a purpose. Addicts who arrive from the treatment industry often lack knowledge of the Twelve Traditions. It seems that many addicts meet regularly to only to help themselves. I found myself using NA as a social club. I tried to socialize and I attended conventions.

Today we experience a full range of feelings. Before coming into the Fellowship, we either felt elated or depressed with very little in between. Our negative sense of self has been replaced by a positive concern for others. Answers are provided and problems are solved. It is a great gift to feel human again.

What a change from the way we used to be! That’s how we know that the N.A. program works. It is the first thing that ever convinced us that we needed to change ourselves, instead of trying to change the people and situations around us. We discover new opportunities. We find a sense of self-worth. We learn self-respect. This is a program for doing just those things. By working the steps, we come to accept a Higher Power’s will; this acceptance leads us to recovery. We lose our fear of the unknown. We are set free.
Chapter Three, ‘Why Are We Here’, last two paragraphs.

‘We needed to change ourselves’ does not always mean I become a different person. For me it means that my efforts are sometimes uncomfortable. I cannot have my way all the time. By committing to carrying the message of NA I learned to put aside my personal preferences. This ability benefits me in other areas of my life. I learn to work with others regardless of my personal feelings. Today, I always feel connected to those around me. Narcotics Anonymous is full of sick people. I no longer socialize with others in NA but on occasion I find people who are kind, compassionate and generous. Life is like that as well. When two members put aside their personalities to carry a message to the newcomer, we experience our greatest strength as a Fellowship. We do recover and that recovery carries over to our lives in society.

I am a Charlatan.

I read the new ‘Group Booklet’ produced by the NAWS Corporation and was offended by the addition of a footnote;

Virtual NA meetings that meet regularly can choose to be an NA group if they meet the criteria described in this booklet.
NAWS Corporation, ‘The Group Booklet’, Page 5, Footnote 3.

My first thought was that only NA Groups host meetings and the NAWS Corporation was trying to circumvent our traditions. Their approval of meetings without the responsibility of following the Twelve Traditions was in my opinion deceptive. The Traditions govern our Groups who host meetings to support members and for the purpose of carrying a message to the still suffering addict. It would not be the first time that NAWS had violated the Traditions. In this case I was wrong, and it was the members of NA who took me to school. Turns out that I am a charlatan.

A study of historical literature brought me to the original information pamphlet, published in 1976.

The gathering together of two or more member addicts for the purpose of learning how to live a drug-free life by practicing the principles of N.A. constitutes an N.A. Meeting. When these meetings are held regularly, they can become a Group.
Narcotics Anonymous, published by C.A.R.E.N.A. in 1976, IP #2, ‘The Group’ – Structure, The Member.

The Member

This 1976 information pamphlet makes the reader familiar with the structure of Narcotics Anonymous and points out that the member is the first and most important part of our service structure. The Upper Cumberland Area of Narcotics Anonymous lists a version here. When members meet for the purpose of living a drug free lifestyle, it is considered a meeting. Even if they meet regularly, they are not necessarily a group. The Group IP was revised in 1988 and dropped the definition of a member and their importance to our service efforts. I believe it was the first time Narcotics Anonymous Fellowship approved literature was replaced with Conference approved literature, but I could be wrong. I wish it had been left as it was and I would encourage everyone to read historical literature. The revised IP included this.

Definition and purpose [of a group]

A Narcotics Anonymous group is any meeting of two or more recovering addicts who meet regularly at a specific time and place for the purpose of recovery from the disease of addiction. All Narcotics Anonymous groups are bound by the principles of the Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions of NA. Each group has but one primary purpose—to carry the message of recovery to the addict who still suffers.
NA IP#2 – ‘The Group’, Revised 1988.

Conference Approved and Fellowship Approved Literature

By 1988, Narcotics Anonymous had become fragmented over the changes brought about by the service structures to the Basic Text (See my post – Paper Empires). Rapid growth and declining participation in service structures created chaos for Narcotics Anonymous. Disunity allowed strong personalities to dominate over principles. The first line in the revised text (above) merges the definition of meeting and group into a confusing statement of opinion. At this point, IP#2, ‘The Group’ became Conference Approved literature and was no longer Fellowship Approved literature. You can read the 1988 World Service Conference discussion at https://www.nahistorytree.com or this link here.

There are other points of confusion as the literature was revised. The use of ‘recovered’ and ‘recovering’ addict. This is a quote from the Fellowship approved version of the Basic Text.

N.A. is a non-profit fellowship or society of men and women for whom drugs had become a major problem. We are recovered addicts who meet regularly to help each other stay clean.
Narcotics Anonymous Basic Text, Second Edition, Chapter 7, “What is the N.A. Program?“

Opinions and Facts

My friend Jed in a discussion once defined ‘Charlatan’ as someone who wears a cloak of spirituality which obscures their true motives. I like this definition from Wikipedia.

A charlatan (also called a swindler or mountebank) is a person practicing quackery or a similar confidence trick in order to obtain money, power, fame, or other advantages through pretense or deception.

See https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Charlatan

Are all addicts in Narcotics Anonymous charlatans? Narcotics Anonymous literature says that we do enjoy complete recovery and acceptance within society.

Yet there are others, completely abstinent, whose dishonesties and self-deceits still prevent them from enjoying complete recovery and acceptance within society.
Basic Text, Second Edition, Chapter 7, Recovery and Relapse, preamble.

Recovered Addict

Today, I enjoy being a recovered addict. I continue to experience the full force of the charlatans where I live. I hear from no one; I am not allowed to serve and today I am ok with that but at one point it caused me to consider suicide. I believe the purest form of recovery is the newcomer as they are free of all pretenses. I no longer hang out with the many toxic cliques that infest our Fellowship. I am only interested in our primary purpose and being part of a home group. I have healthy boundaries and enjoy the wide base of personalities within a home group. I focus on recognizing the Grace of God that allowed me to not use today. My actions are from gratitude for that gift. Fortunately, my home group offers unconditional love to me even when I start to trip over my opinions presented as facts. I am grateful today to recognize the disease within me with the help of others. Each day begins with the opportunity to enjoy complete recovery and the opportunity to continue to communicate with newer members. Each day I can act like a charlatan, presenting opinions as facts and distancing myself from reality. I have choice today. I am free!